Thursday, October 25, 2012

We're 03 Years today!!

We're celebrating 03 years of HAPPILY MARRIED LIFE today. And in sense of the word. And its great to be a 03 member family to celebrate it too. Such abundance of blessings in my life, I am humbled before Him.

Today, apart from a few other gifts I got for Babi, I made her a small video. A video with a collection of pictures the marks our 03 year old journey and every picture had a story to tell. To use as the background music, I requested my friend Vandana Srinivasan, to send me one of her songs, and she very graciously consented. I insisted that I use only her song because her voice and delivery fully explains the state of mind I am whenever I am with my wife. That "flung into the heavens" kind of mood.

This is the video that I made:

Babi saw this video when I wasn't around. I was upstairs and she was seeing it below. She called me and I heard a broken voice. Fearing if anything had gone wrong, I rushed down - only to see her weeping uncontrollably seeing the video. She could not even say a word, she just hugged me and wept. And she told me everything that her heart wanted to tell even without uttering a word.

And when she finally did manage to get words out, she said she was sorry for not getting me any gift. I only said, "You gave me the biggest gift you could every give. Nothing, at no time can match this amazing gift ever, EVER in my life." Tears rolled down again. This time it was mutual.


The original video is this :

Wednesday, October 24, 2012

Happy 3rd Tomo!

Tomorrow is our 3rd wedding anniversary. Wow! What an eventful three years we had. Each and every moment memorable though. I am so glad that I have now reached a point that I know I will die without having my wife around me. This is *exactly* where I wanted to reach in a relation with my wife.

Attaching here is the website we had made for our wedding. So excited every time I see this page.

Shibu and Babitha - Wedding (Click on the link)

Talk to ya'll soon. :)

Monday, October 22, 2012

38 Weeks = The Grand Finale.

What a great finale!! Vihaan is finally here - My baby is here!

At exactly 38 weeks, Babi and I are parents. 

Its surprising how we all dread about the delivery and when it comes and goes, you realize that it isn't as hard as you thought it would be. Atleast, so was our case.

After a really nice meal yesterday, Babi and I went off to sleep. Just before we slept, her mom told us that she was more than a finger dilated and she would deliver soon. As I had already mentioned in my last blog post, I had been frustrated. I wanted to see my baby - NOW! Babi told me to hold my horses and wait. And that's what I did.

0830hrs: Babi feels a bit of contractions. She says it wasnt the "real" contractions, but there is an increased force.

0845hrs: Amma checks her and finds out that she is 3cms dilated already and says we need to rush her to the hospital (Moulana Hospital) and the baby should be out by evening, considering that its her first delivery.

0930hrs: Babi is taken to the labor room and I am called saying that we will have the baby soon.

0945hrs: I reach the hospital and rush to the labor room.

1030hrs: The contractions have become stronger and Babi has shooting pain down on her back towards her thighs. Still, situation under control.

1050hrs: Contractions have become stronger. She's been dilated to 8cms already. Amma, who was then taking her rounds in the ward was called into the labor room immediately. Nitrous Oxide gas started for analgesia.

1055hrs: Amma is in the labor room and see's that Babi is nearly 10cms dilated and the time has finally come to receive my boy.

1125hrs: Babi is fully dilated and has been asked to push hard with every contraction. Babi stops taking the N20 gas saying that its choking her throat.

1130hrs: All doctors (6) from anesthesiologists to neonatologists to Amma's colleagues are all in the labor room to support Babi.

1133hrs: There is a sudden dip in the fetal heart sound. Amma in panicky. She suspects that the child is in respiratory distress.

1134hrs: Vaccum is applied and fundal pressure is given.

1135hrs: Baby is out. Vihaan is born. Cried as soon as the head was out. But then he went blue scaring the shit out of me - but he gained breathing movements soon, and is healthy.

1140hrs: I call daddy and mummy and cry loud like a baby - told him "Daddy, Babi has delivered the most cutest baby boy". Daddy was so jubilant that he could barely breathe. 

1145hrs: General happiness. Peace sets in.

So, contrary to everyone's thoughts who never knew that Babi could tolerate so much pain and deliver a baby, she did. And she did it bravely.

Thanks to her, thanks to Amma, thanks to the Almighty - we are all so blessed to have Vihaan in our arms today - as the pioneer of the next generation in both our families.

He's finally HERE!!!

Dear all!!

We are proud to announce the arrival of our baby boy. He arrived at 1135 hrs today weighing an amazing 3.4 Kgs in a vaccum delivery.

So make way for our cherished one - VIHAAN SHIBU. He's here to rock the world - my rockstar!

Sunday, October 21, 2012

This wait

Dearest lil hun,

You are 37+6 weeks old today and mommy is looking not-so-happy with this wait now. Infact so is daddy. We cant wait to see you now baby. Please try and come out as soon as possible baby. Your grandma was discussing about inducing labour maybe early next week, because she does not want you to hang in there way too long, but I wonder, why not tomorrow?

On the other hand, as much as your mom wants you out into the world, she does not want any artificial intervention. She doesn't want any induction, she doesn't want any caesarian section. But to tell you frankly, I for one dont think that your mom will have the courage to go through the whole labour, because she has a very low tolerance for pain. And it isn't her fault because as much as she wants it, I know she wont be able to take it.

Normal labour or otherwise, I just want to see you fast. I think I am frustrated now. Sorry. :(

Love and waiting,


Friday, October 19, 2012

37+ weeks

Babi hates to pose for pics anymore. 

Dearest lil champ,

So you’ve started showing the true colours of being a scorpio huh? Stubborn.  All this while you scared us by showing signs of coming out pre-maturely and now when it is actually the time, you are taking it easy and hanging deep inside there huh? I can imagine how difficult it must be for you to leave that cozy world, the world in which you are so close to your mom’s heart and come into this world where there is so much to deal with.

There is no match to your world here, but there is daddy in here too. I will iron all those creases on your path and give you the shade and warmth that you require, all in excess. And why to worry when you get to be with mom too all you want. Also, you get to see your chachu and maasi and your grandpa and grannys. They are so so excited to see you. You’ll get to see one of your granny probably before you see anyone of us, because she is the one who is going to conduct your mom’s labor in the labor room. And you have so many wonderful aunts and uncles, brothers and sisters, so many people who are praying that you come out into our world, healthy and handsome – to take all our lives by storm.

Come, come, come baby… Papa cant wait any further. Are you convinced or need I more?



Wednesday, October 10, 2012

36+ weeks

Babi : Please stop punching me baby..

Dearest cup-cake,

Today I heard your heart-beats through my stethoscope.  It was such a great feeling. I feel the right word is – liberating. Beating at such a fast pace, as if telling me that you are waiting to come out and meet the both of us. And its likewise baby – cos everytime we perceive a movement or a kick, our heart races with joy too.

When its time for you to draw those curtains and finally see us, you’ll see two loving hearts amidst many others, two hearts to whom your existence have meant the world, two hearts who have counted each minute and measured each milestone of your growth inside, two hearts for whom nothing means more than having you in our lives – two hearts you’ll call Accha and Mamma.

We love you baby. Come soon. Cant wait.



Tuesday, October 9, 2012

Hiccups from inside.

Last night Babi called me into our bedroom and she was very anxious. When I asked her what happened, she showed me her belly. Her belly moved in rhythmic contractions and we being doctors, knew for sure that it had nothing to do with the onset of labor.

As usual, I freaked out. Could it be that our baby is in distress? Can he be stuck for lack of amniotic fluid volume? Can it be a seizure? The most complicated and disturbing thoughts flashed into my mind for a brief point of time. In panicky, I picked up the phone and called Amma. She told us that these phenomenon are normal and there is nothing to worry. She said that it might be that the baby is having hiccups.

Still not convinced, I forced Babi to accompany me to the nearby hospital. She denied and asked me to fully trust her mother's judgement. Worried, panicky and totally lost, I turned to where everyone in such a situation would do. The internet. I searched the net and I found two videos and seeing them, there was no room left for doubt. I am attaching those videos here for reference to parents, should they go through something like this. And know this much - its a good thing!! It means that the Central Nervous System of your child has been fully developed.Since then, these hiccups have been entertaining and reassuring.

So worry not and just enjoy the moment. God speed.

Monday, October 8, 2012

Fear owns us all.

Fear is an emotion induced by a perceived threat that causes animals to move quickly away from the location of the perceived threat, and sometimes hide. It is a basic survival mechanism occurring in response to a specific stimulus, such as pain or the threat of danger. In short, fear is the ability to recognize danger leading to an urge to confront it or flee from it (also known as the fight-or-flight response) but in extreme cases of fear (horror and terror) a freeze or paralysis response is possible. -Wikipedia.

Well, that's all Wikipedia has got? Fear to me is much more than that. It's subject to change depending on the situation I am in.

I fear that my preparation for my exams are not good enough,
I fear that my theoretical knowledge of medicine that has rusted over time, will be the reason for my fall.
I fear to think that I am already a year behind a few colleagues of mine,
I fear that this fear will stop me from extracting the best of me.

I fear that any thing could go wrong at any point during the pregnancy.
I fear that the worst nightmares I have about delivery is actually what I have known to have happened in real.
I fear that may happen in my case too.
I fear that these negative thoughts can actually bring unwanted negative energy.
I fear about my wife's and baby's good health.
I fear that there is nothing much I can do about it.
I fear I am not giving so much time to my wife, as I should be now.
I fear that this time that is slipping from my hands will never come back.

I fear each night, because it brings me closer to my exams.
I fear less each night because it also brings me closer to meeting my baby.
I fear which side of the fence my mind will tread to every dark night.
I fear fear fiercely.

Fear - I do not want you to have the best of me! :(

Sunday, October 7, 2012

Baby Names

Why cant my baby have any name in the world?

Why does any name necessarily have to denote the religion that person embraces?

Why cant a Hindu kid have the name Akbar or Kabir and why cant a Muslim child have the name Jaspreet or William?

Babi and I loved the names Armaan (boy) and Aafreen (girl), but its got shot down so badly by almost EVERYONE I know. Parents, friends, relatives. 

Dont the parents of the kid really have a say? Do all Hindu kids need to be named Ram or Shyam or Vishnu? Or should kids be the real ones to chose what name they should have?

All questions good, but answers all the same. I know that I will follow suit too, like how many do. 

But I always believe that every one should have the freedom to embrace whatever religion they want to, and it should not just be because of the virtue of being born into a family who already has one.

What do you think?

Friday, October 5, 2012

35+ Weeks

Dearest Munchkin,

How are you holding up in there my champ? Gearing up for your big debut huh? I am sure - cos like father, like child.

While you are doing your final preps in there, your mom and I are doing our bit of preparations at this end too. Your granny(s) have warned us from shopping anything for you before your big entry, because they say that brings ill luck. So sticking by that, we have been extensively (mostly your mom) checking up in the internet and adding things into our shopping cart. But no purchases yet!
Babi at 35+ weeks

You mom already knows what is the in-thing in baby world already. I keep hearing names like Chicco, Graco, Lillebabe, Ju.Ju.Be, and the endless list. I love all those things she has chosen for you, so it makes things a lot easier for the both of us, cos there is less debate. :)

Moreso, your mom has chosen everything in two shades - blue and pink. And you know why. We'll finally boil down onto one soon.

So keep growing in there, safe and sound. Listen to all those beautiful voices who come close to you and talk to you, for they are the ones who are close to your mom's and dad's heart. You'll love them too eventually, as much as they love you already.

Cant wait to see you baby.



Thursday, October 4, 2012

Baby Shower

We celebrated Babi's baby shower. I wanted to make her baby shower really big. I wanted to call all our special friends, people who have been through all this with us, and also people who are really close to our hearts.

But just then, many of my friends raised a signal of caution telling me that it could get jinxed and that not many people should come to know and blah blah.. Not that I really buy it, because I dont mind making any amount of noise about the arrival of my baby, but then again, the last thing I want is some ill befall either the mother or the child because of some reason - whatever it may be.

So I just took the closest family members out, those who happened to be with us. Its surprising, because, these were the also two people who have been through Babi's entire pregnancy along our side - helping, supporting, loving. And I cant think of many more who could be in our list as important as them - for who they were to us, and for what they have done.

We all went dressy to Vivanta by Taj, Thycaud and celebrated Babi's baby shower - with love, laughter and happiness.


And just then I realised - it is not the amount of people on your list - its the quality of time spent. And when it came to that - I know for sure that it was a night Babi would never forget, for we had a beautiful, BEAUTIFUL evening.

Friday, September 28, 2012

Babi and Barfi

Ever since Babi got a red alert from her mom saying that the baby's head has come down a little bit, she has been on bed-rest. That also put an end to all those eating outside dinners, long drives, beach-hopping, watching movies, shopping - everything. So the only chance for movie-buffs like us to catch up on the latest flicks was to wait for the torrents to arrive, and then download and see them.

The last movie we saw was Barfi. It was a decent flick. The cast acted brilliantly, but there was a lot of plagiarization - in terms of presentation, dialougues, ideas, etc. But on the whole, I think it was a decent watch. But Babi LOVED the movie. She says she could watch the flick for alteast ten more times. I wonder how. I mean, seriously?

But what amazed me in the movie is the striking resemble the character Jhilmil had with Babi when she was small. I am attaching a pic here and thus, leaving none of you to wander in your imagination. There.

I know, Babi is going to KILL ME for this one. Adios. :)

34+ Weeks

Dear hun.

So a big baby by now eh? I am amazed by how you would always respond to every time you hear my voice. How you would kick everytime I would sing to you. How you wake up from your blissful sumber everytime I touch your mommy. How do you know its daddy who is there near you? Do you really know or is it just co-incidence? Naah - it cant be that - you ALWAYS know. I wonder if you'd always be happy to be near daddy, even when you come out, and also when you grow up. Aah well, I dont want to start of with this expectations thing even before you are born. Ahahahaha. I wonder if its true what mom used to tell me , "you'll only know once you are a parent" when I used to brush her off saying she was over-emotional and worries for us beyond proportion. I am not even there yet, and yet this is how things are. Its all in the circle of life my child. Your granparents did it. I am doing it. Someday you too will do it. And if and when you do, you'll always have these letters that pappa has written for you - to check back and chuckle.

Mommy and Daddy
Meanwhile, your mommy is glowing. She gave me a fright of my life when she told me a few days back that you have not been moving for a while. I tried all the tricks I had in my kitty to wake you up, but you just dont budge. Worked up, with the worst possible thoughts popping in my head, your mom and me gave a SOS call to your granny. The moment you heard your mom and granny talk, there - a kick like never before. Strong, dominating, and totally under control. It was like you were trying to tell us to be more brave and stop acting like sissies. Lol. I think that's the worst part of being doctors and knowing the physiology of all this - only the worst possible outcomes flash into your head giving you a feeling like a stroke.

Anyways, you've been behaving well since then. And that's what matters. Mommy and I have started preparations for the big day. The day you would arrive into our arms. The day that'll be worth all the pain and discomfort and immobilisation mom went through the past 09 months. Worth it all.

As for me, well, I tried to pitch in a lot too. Trying to make mom and you as comfortable as possible. But I enjoyed every single moment of the past few months - watching you grow, knowing to respond to our voice, feeling like a dad - every bit of it.

I will stop now. More in the next letter. Till then, keep kicking my child.



Wednesday, September 26, 2012

Materialistic Overdrive

The boy needs his share of indulgences right? Yes, and here is mine.

The list of things I need to buy the moment my bank savings summary reaches a decent figure.
  1. Royal Enfield Thunderbird Bike
  2. Laptop, this time its got to be Dell - still dont know which.
  3. Nikon D90 SLR
  4. Samsung s3
  5. iPad 4
Well, thats ALL for the moment in my wishlist. More, many more before I reach that monetary benchmark. Ever!!

Saturday, September 22, 2012

33+ weeks

Dear Love,

Watching you grow our miracle inside you,
Makes my heart swell with pride for you,
Nobody could be a prettier mom than you,
And I hope our baby goes every bit by you.

You brighten even my darkest day,
You wash away every trace of dismay,
You make me want to live life than just exist,
Your love envelopes me like a comforting mist.

Never, nobody, nothing can replace you,
Nothing seems more meaningful to me than to say I LOVE YOU.

My Wife - My Love
I love you to live,
I live to love you.

Me. :)

Friday, September 21, 2012

Dad's Pregnancy Symptoms

Dearest honey-bun,

How are you doing today my baby love? By the way the mommy darlings tummy is growing, I am sure you are growing up just right. What more can make a daddy happy I wonder.

The whole world talks about mother's pregnancy symptoms and what it takes to be a mother. I agree with that because they go through a LOT through the pregnancy, and nothing in the world can match or take away the importance and privilege of being a mom. But one other person goes through a lot, atleast almost, through these nine months - the dad-to-be.
Eating, Drinking, Swelling like a raisin
For me, it wasn't that tough. I had dreamed of being here even before I got here. That's a whole other story altogether, but my point is - I've got some weird symptoms too. Ok, I know that this freaks you out as much as it freaks me out to write this to you - but there it is. Wide in the open.

Of-late I feel my tummy is increasing in size as well. I have weird symptoms like gastritis and constipation and weight gain, nausea, insomnia, and mood swings. I checked up the internet for reasons because I was too ashamed of discussing it with my friends and my colleagues who are also doctors or fathers. It seems it is called the "Sympathetic" something. Nonsense. I guess they can call it what ever they want as long as they are not going through it themselves. *****!!

Oh, sorry baby, I forgot we arent supposed to swear in front of a baby.

Anyways, that's all for now, cute bum, because I think I am getting a mood-swing already.




Thursday, September 20, 2012


We all are taught how to pray by our elders. For some it is their grandparents, sometimes godparents, but mostly, just like in my case – their parents. For me my mom taught me how to pray. Two times a day. She taught us how we needed to be thankful to God for each passing day. How to pray for the blessings we received that day and how important it was to keep praying to keep it that way for the next day. How to pray for the elders in the family and people who we know who are sick or needy. How to pray for each other in our 4 member family. And for 25 years of my life I said the same prayer. New people would get included daily, but the core group was always the same. 

Then came Babi into my life. And then she would be a major part of my prayer. I'd pray how to keep her happy. How to not do or say anything that would hurt her. How to be worthy of her unending love, daily and every moment. How to make her proud of being with me.

3 years and now what I pray for mostly and almost always is for my Babi and baby. No amount of praise or worship is enough for the kind of blessing He has showered on me and my family. I pray that Babi goes through the entire pregnancy safely and has a smooth delivery. I pray that my lil bun comes out into this world shouting in happiness and joy. I pray that the love I have for my family now grows by each passing day. I pray that my time on earth be extended so much so that when I go away from here, I know my Babi is safe with my baby and that my baby is strong enough to take care of her. If that is met, I will be ready for you my Lord, to embrace your unfailing love in Heaven - to watch over them - still - with unending awe.

Wednesday, September 19, 2012

Baby and Love.

Dearest Cutie,

Nothing in the world today makes me more happy than to keep calling you my baby,
Nothing in the world can parallel our love in feeling you grow day-by-day my bunny,
Little sounds that you hear from the world outside your mummy's belly,
Are imperfect sounds of your daddy's lullaby.
You have gone through a lot already my lil baby bun,
And that makes me sure that one day you will shine like the sun.
When days go by and the time is fit for you to arrive,
You will change our lives with your mere presence - oh so sublime!
And time will slip away knowing and loving and caring my apple-pie,
And before we will know you'll be a big boy and the constant source of our joy.
And my heart swells to know we have been chosen to be through this,
To hold you and welcome you into this world with a tight kiss.
To nurture and love you till the time we have been given here on earth has been spent,
And to go back to tell Him how blessed we were, just to be your parent.
Even then our love for you will shower, maybe like the silent wind, or a shower,
Watching your path, sieving your troubles, gazing at our miracle in mystic wonder.
Nothing in this world would take your place in my heart ever,
Nothing in my pocketful of memories will overtake my fate to be your father,
For ever and never.

My Baby in a 4D Scan Image
Cant wait to see you my darling,



Sunday, September 16, 2012

31 Weeks.

Dear little baby,

You are growing and doubling in size in there, arent you? I can feel that from the size of mom's tummy. I have always complained to her that her tummy isn't growing enough and my fears worsened when the doctor said that there was some calcifications in her placenta and that could compromise with your nutrient supply. But she also said that you have the perfect weight and that you are kicking in there just fine. That gave me immense relief. But however the "calcifications" thing was a cause for worry and your granny-ma adviced that a blood volume expander be pushed into your mom's blood so that you dont run out of space in there to play. And ever since that has gone in, her tummy has become a lot bigger. How I love to see your mom like this. She has this glow on her face that I havent seen before. She has become a lot chubbier and cute and I am sure she is going to be one of the most prettiest mom that you and I'd ever know.

Keep growing in there my baby like a good child and dont struggle to come out too soon. Its a nice place out here too, with warm hearts, many people to love and daddy, but also there is no place that is safer than the one your mom has for you. A cosy place, right below her heart. You lucky one!

Love you tons,


30+ Weeks

Dearest Munch-kin,

Howdie pardner! So, its been a while since I have written to you. But I am sure you have nothing to complain because in the absence of these letters I have been talking and singing to you. You've always shown your special attraction to music ever since we could feel your little kicks. You would give a signal to your mommy that you are liking it in there - especially Tamil Film Music - the Dappankuthu. And for the feel of it, your mom would just increase the volume to see your kicks growing stronger and with vigour. And I love to know that you love music too. Your mom as you already know is a gifted singer. As for me, as you know by now, is also a person who wishes were a better singer. How I love to sing - but how I lack the timbre and education in music to pull it off. But let me assure you - when you are out from that cosy place, I'll sing you lullabies to put you off to sleep and I would do it just fine. Trust me.

I have off-late being downloading a lot of songs - all lullabies, the ones I wish to sing to you - now and also when you are right here in my arms. I like the Malayalam lullabies more than the Hindi and English ones. Maybe because I have sung some of them to lil kids I've known as I grew up and maybe more-so because those were the ones my mom sang to me when I was a kid. My daddy, your grandpa, had recorded cassettes of my songs, those that I'd sing when I was only 2. Can you imagine that? Such a brilliant start and what a pathetic journey! Alas. Many parents I know, even many of my generation, want to make their kids engineers and lawyers and doctors and pilots like themselves. I dont ask for any of those. You are our kid and any which thing you'll chose, I know you'll know exactly what you want and we would always be there with you through it. What I ask from God for you is an ability to sing, or maybe atleast play an instrument. The ability to do that one thing I so so much wanted to do in my life. This might sound like loading your shoulders with the hopes and failed personal aspirations that parents put on their children's shoulders from time to time, but trust you me - it is not. It is just a very personal favor that I ask of God. That personal favor which I shall be so blessed to receive through you.

I wonder if you can hear my voice a bit more clearly in there now hun. Your mom says that everytime I touch her tummy or just talk to her, you wake up inside of her. Is it because you love to listen to daddy? Or is it just co-incidence? I like to wish that the former one is true. And its simply because I love you.



Saturday, September 15, 2012

Just Happy.

Back to base after a refreshing and rejuvenating time at my home in Thrissur with my family. Its got bigger and more beautiful with Mira joining into our league. And as for me, I've got bigger too - in my tummy and my memories. Its a quantum shift from being the man-of-the-house to being the elder 'child' in the family. I could just call up/ask dad to get me a burger or a Shawarma whenever he'd go out for getting groceries just like we did when we were kids, or just ask mom to cook me something I really relish, sometimes for breakfast which I'd only do at 10 am. It was all so nice and sublime, something so worth the wait I've waited - thinking and dreaming and planning for the past many months. Sometimes you are so happy in the inside that you cant complain even when it has ended because you know deep inside that you have with you a precious memory - a memory that you are going to treasure for a long time to come. Yes, today, inspite of being back from that abundance of love, I am still happy. Really Happy.

Sunday, September 9, 2012

Shiju + Mira

And the BIG DAY finally arrived. My brother's Wedding Day. And it happened to be a day when everything just turned out to be perfect. Perfect unfolding of events, perfectly looking couple, perfect food, perfect stage and the perfect weather - RAINS! It hadn't rained that crazy for many days till then. But on that day, it rained, and rained and it never stopped. Its amazing how we still managed to actually have everyone to attend the function on time and manage to make everything roll out according to schedule.

I am attaching a small video of that wonderful day - the last wedding in our small family, of our generation. Happy Viewing!

Tuesday, June 26, 2012

13th June. 2012. - Black Day!

It is with profound sorrow, sadness and regret that I inform you of the death of my most-loving and dear Father-in-law, Mr. Balasubramanian. He died peacefully to his last and long battle with cancer, day before yesterday - June 13, 2012. The cremation took place yesterday at Shantigiri on the banks of Bharathapuzha River, at 11.00 a.m.

I am deeply saddened yet gratified that he is now in a place of no disease or fighting for survival. May the Lord bless the departed soul with Eternal Peace. 

Mathrubhumi and Malayala Manorama - News.

Wednesday, June 20, 2012

20+ Weeks. Anomaly Scan.

Dear hun,

It was a treat to our eyes to see you again today. Today we saw you sucking your thumb and also patting onto mommy's uterine wall. You look so cute in there. Doctor says that you are perfectly fine for your age and that you are defect-free. That was such music to my ears. I dont have words to explain!!

I only wish Acchan was also there to share this happiness. Till the last USG he was there right here with us. Sigh.

Love you so so much my cutie-pie.


20 Weeks

Dearest Hun,

I am sorry for you to have gone through this terrible loss. Words fail me to explain what mommy is going through at this moment. I am heart broken too, but nothing compares to what she is enduring. She wouldnt cry loud and she wished she could just mourn to the irreplaceable loss she's had - but she's worried that would affect you. Your mom is a very strong woman my child. She is a fighter but with a heart of gold. Your mom has never failed to inspire me from the moment I met her. Daddy always tries to be worthy of her love - a love that knows no limits.

You obviously are hearing people around you crying and speaking with a heavy heart, in contrast to all those joyous voices you'd heard till then, but baby - thats exactly the curve life follows. And its how we tread on these rough patches that decide what we are made up of, or what we'll eventually be.

Please pray for your mommy, ammomma and maasi.. They need so much inner strength. Also pray for your acchachan and acchaama. They are equally heart broken. How wouldn't they be - your Ammacchan was such a great man. He would have loved you so much if he were around when you came.

Hang in there safe and tight my lil one - because out here its going to be a bumpy ride.

Kisses and love,


Happy Father's Day - Thank you Dad(s).

I want to take a moment out to thank two of the most important people in my life on this day. 

My Acchan, who is now in heaven and is watching over us to give us courage and make sure that we dont lose our way. I will always always be grateful for you for trusting in me so as to give me your precious daughter as my wife. I will never ever forget what a wonderful and gentle man you were - always smiling, always forgiving, always loving and never complaining. These are values I kept imbibing from you every single day you were with us. And I would be a more than blessed if I could become half of what you were in that qualities you had. I miss you, your absence, your love - today and forever.

My Dad - for being the light of my life. My inspiration. My trust. My protector. My guide. My God. Thank you for making me what I am today. Thank you for always giving me the best of everything no matter what sacrifices you had to make to provide me with those. Daddy, I have and always will love you in a way I can't explain with words. You have been, are and will always be my HERO. My Daddy.

HAPPY FATHER'S DAY to the both of you. Everyday is father's day for children with dads like you around.

Goodbye Accha... I miss you so much!

Mr. Balasubramanian (Mani)
It is with profound sorrow, sadness and regret that I inform you of the death of my most-loving and dear Father-in-law, Mr. Balasubramanian. He died peacefully to his last and long battle with cancer, day before yesterday - June 13, 2012. The cremation took place yesterday at Shantigiri on the banks of Bharathapuzha River, at 11.00 a.m.

I am deeply saddened yet gratified that he is now in a place of no disease or fighting for survival. May the Lord bless the departed soul with Eternal Peace.

Monday, June 11, 2012

18 Weeks.

Dear hun,

Today mommy and I were calling you all sorts of names and wondering if you would respond to any of them by showing some movement in there. But you did not. I keeping checking up the internet and various other books to see when we'll know that you are a big baby now - and they all give varied answers, none of which is true obviously, since you haven't kicked. Your granny says that it would take an other 4 weeks for you to kick as your mom has a very strong in her abs. Anyways, daddy is going to wait till then!! :)

Lately you must have heard a lot of aunt Divya's voice right? She's a darling. Whenever daddy needed someone right from college Divya aunty was always there for me. She was a friend, sibling, companion, guide, study partner and a brilliant listener since then and till now. We all need to have our best friends baby. When daddy was in college, other boys in college used to smirk about the idea of best friends. They said that Best Friends were a concept of the past, of school. But I never thought it that way. I always had my best friends and still hold on to most of them. Divya aunty has almost always been on the list and the times she hasn't, we've been fighting like all close buddies do. Baby, I know Divya aunty will be the aunty you'd love to go and spend your holidays with and discuss your secrets with because she's a darling and one of a kind. A single piece. And she cant wait to see you as much as us.

While you are hanging in there, I hope you are listening to the few prayers we have and communicating the same to God. Please do that baby. The prayers we have are more for others than for us, and doing that we'll all be blessed twice. Just listen to the prayers in mummy's chest and you'll know what I am talking about.

That's all for now baby. Kick soon!! ;)


Appa. :)

Sunday, June 10, 2012

17 Weeks

Dearest lil baby,

Both mummy and I can see that you are growing quickly in there cos mummy's tummy is finally showing. The baby bump has finally come. And daddy finds it so cute, though mummy says she misses her "figure". Imagine!!

Yesterday, both of us took you on a long drive to the beach. We wanted you to hear the mystic noise of the waves. We wanted you to know how the sound would be like of water gushing onto the sand. Mummy even  sat down on the sand so that the water would come and tickle you and go away. But I presume you wouldnt have felt much in there, because you are surrounded by water on all sides. Lol.

Mommy with her friends on the beach.
We know that you can hear everything in there now. Your ear ossicles must have developed so well. It must be  such a blessing for you to sit in there and listen to the sweet voice of mummy all the time. You hear our Brownie and Bambi too in there, dont you? We wonder how it would be when they meet you and you meet them. I am sure you all will love one another cos you know them and their voices so well already.

I see that mom isnt eating much. Does that leave you hungry hun? If its a yes, gimme a hint and I shall force feed mommy, ok?

Alright baby, once again - love you and cant wait to have you downloaded.

Much love,

Daddy. :)

Saturday, June 2, 2012

Do you like music, baby?

Vandana Srinivasan
Dear baby,

The past few days we have made you listen to all kinds of music. Mummy and I have lately exposed you a lot to Vandana Srinivasan's voice, cos mommy just cant get enough of her songs. She also wishes that you could sing like her. There's a magic in her voice we feel. Dont you think so too baby? But daddy wishes that you'd be just as good as your mother and that'll make you a rockstar too.

Rocking to DJ AB
As you know all three of us have been partying a lot the past week. And luckily, the DJs were all very good. As mommy swayed and dadda jumped to the music, I wonder if you were partying in there too. Mommy and daddy loves to dance, as you already know by now. You too develop a taste for it soon, because its there in your genes anyway.

That apart, things look fine out here in the world outside.

Till we talk next, loads of love and poochies.


Sunday, April 29, 2012

14 weeks.

Dear hun,
Today your mom and I talked a lot about how your coming into our lives has changed it fully. And its been so overwhelming that I cant really imagine how it would be when you are out of your cozy abode into the world. Your mom often tells me - "you have no idea what I am going through in here.." everytime I ask her why she would throw a fit of tantrum/mood-swing for no reason or why she wouldn't consent to go to the movies in the night (something which we religiously have done before). Sometimes I wonder - is that such a big deal? Then I think - I only am 'imagining' how you are growing there in fantastic pace, but she is actually helping you do that. And trust me hunie, it really wares out your mom. But when she thinks of the outcome in a few months, she soldiers on - bravely - just like the army wife that she is. Your mom really loves you hun. And she's given up a great deal to just have you. I will tell you all that in due time but for now I hope that you enjoyed the wonderful meal mom has had. I am sure you are relishing those extra calories your mom is having just for you. Mommy says that I should not be singing old hindi and malayalam songs for you. Why would you not like those songs just cos she doesn't right? Maybe you would share my tastes for music. But your mom sings so beautifully well, and mine, well, you know by now! ;) Btw, do you actually hear me singing for you? Do you like it? Well, what choice do you have right? Maybe when you are a little bigger than now, you could give some signals to your mom and I would take it as a clue. But there is a great chance that I would interpret the signals the way I would imagine and not your mom. So well hunie, you're kinda stuck with nowhere to run. Just hang in there and enjoy the music. ;~)

Your beautiful mommy..

Mommy & Daddy.

13 weeks plus.

Ultrasound at 12 weeks
Dearest lil hun,

You are growing at a very fast pace now. The last time your mom and I saw you, you were just the size of a peanut. All we could see then was some dark and light images with a small little heart beating inside. You have no idea how much that one sight set our hearts racing. Your mom wasn't really sure till then that you were there inside of her - growing to be our first baby.

Now you have your tiny legs and hands to play with. When we were seeing you, you were busy playing in the shelter your mom has given you that you did not allow the doctor to measure your heart rate. He said, "you have an active baby there", but what I think he meant was - you have a very naughty baby there.

Daddy cant wait to see you lil hun. I feel jealous of mom that she gets to keep you for nine months all for her self close to her heart. But I promise you my baby that once you are out from there into my hands, I'll always keep you close to my chest and keep you warm - sheltered in love.

You are our first baby and we cant wait to have you out into our world. You have the most loveliest mom in the world and she will love you in a way that you can never imagine. She's a fountain of love that'll never dry. And as for me - I'll try and be a good dad too.

The doctor says that to see you next, we have to wait for another two months and by then mom will be 6 months pregnant with you. Then we'll know if you are a princess or a prince. Whatever you are already, we will love you the best way we can.

So sleep now my baby and grow fast and safe, cos daddy cant wait to hold you in his arms.



Saturday, March 3, 2012

New Year 2012.

Its already March and I have no clue when all this time slipped by from the time we celebrated the New Year Eve. Just like the way it started, now I know what a brilliant year lay ahead of me.

Thank you God. You've always kept my family and me in your shelter.

Monday, February 27, 2012


I shall Pass through this world but once.

Any good that I can do, Any kindness that I can show to any human being, let me do it now, and not defer it.

For I shall not pass this way again.

- Stephen Grellet 1855