Tuesday, May 25, 2010

How much hurt is it anyway?

How much hurt will you be when you get hurt because someone close to you was insensitive to you? How much more hurt will you be if they did not even realise they hurt you? And which hurt will hurt you more?

Doesn’t it also hurt when you had to pretend that you were not hurt by the actions of that person. Doesn’t it also hurt when you think that you wished they would ask for forgiveness for that one act of theirs that hurt you? Doesn’t it hurt to know that it’s become more of a routine for them now- to turn deaf to the sounds of your heart. Doesn’t it hurt to think all that you are compromising for is actually going in vain, because the other person just doesn’t get it? Doesn’t that hurt you way too bad? It does, doesn’t it?

Friday, May 14, 2010

Handling success isnt everyones cup of tea

Yesterday gallantry awards were given to the soldiers who proved their mettle in combat the last year. In a colourful presentation ceremony 1 officer, 1 JCO and 2 soldiers stood commended with the Chief-of-Army-Staff commendation Card. One of the prestigious awards bestowed for courage and bravery in the face of adversity.
There was a well-deserved pride and aura around the winners for reasons well appreciated. And it was due. Getting where they did wasnt an cake walk and since we all knew that well, we were equally happy and were basking in their glory and fulfilment. But there was one person who was strikingly different from the rest 3. He stood there unaffected. Calm, composed, with no obvious exaltation on his face. It made me so amazed that I did not take my eyes out of him for a long time. He stood there smiling at everyone who came to wish him, saluting officers who commanded him, and just waiting there sa if he were standing on a normal roll-call.
Being their doctor, I wasnt really sure what got him this award, but all I knew was that it should have been something well worth mention because this award is something to die for. Literally too. On asking I found out that he had risked his life, twice, in an attempt to eliminate the terrorists. The vivid account my buddy gave me is too confidential to scribble here, but all I can say was that, he really deserved it. He WAS brave. And I also got to know that this was his fourth commendation card in a service spanning 09 yrs.
I couldnt be more surprised. How many of us can success as just a recognition of our hardwork, and move on striving for better glories, without making any pomp and show about it? I mean, doesnt success also deserve that kind of treatment? Oh come on, you have tasted it too, havent you? Have you even kept count of the many people whom you informed and shared your happiness with? No. Because, its a normal human machanism to exalt in ones own success. It like feeding ones own ego and adding oil into the I-am-a-power-to-reckon-with image, which we all silently keep within ourselves.
I talked to him at the end of the presentation, and asked him whats bothering him that doesnt make him as happy as the others and he said that he wasnt really sure if he deserved it more than the 5 others whose name was recommended for the same award and who were not lucky. He rose to a position well beyond all of us in just a dialougue and today I feel proud being associated with men like him in even the most minute way. Meeting him and seeng his mind, I am convinced again that there are people in this world to whom not only their happiness matters, but others too. People who wouldnt mind sacrifising their own gain for the smile on their peer's face. People who inspite of being honoured and kept above others, stood humbled by the place they were in. People who would define modesty in its most purest form.
It was a day to remember for me. To see the happiness and share the crowing moments with the winners, and more importantly, being blessed with an oppurtunity to learn from that person, who taught a lot in just a line. Jai Jawan, Jai Kisan.

Wednesday, May 12, 2010

Dont even try it. Its worthless.

I am sure you all must have been in a situation where we have emotionally forced somebody to do something for us, just to make us happy or maybe somebody other than the both of you happy. I dont know about you, but one thing I know is that, I have done that many times than one.
I havent done it in the conventional way always, but I am sure as hell that I did make my point every other time. I could give the instances, but then it would be too obvious to the person who might at sometime read this. Even when this proposition is the rarest possibility.
When I look at it, I think its all got to do with our expectations. What we would love to get from the other person, for our investment into the relation, really bothers us.And even if the other person wouldnt have even thought/planned of doing 'that' thing you wanted from them, they would invariably do it for you...for your happiness, because they care for it in someway you cant explain. And wouldnt have if you did not voluntarily expressed/forced your desire on them.
What I think after being in this kinda situation so many times, is it really worth it? I mean, the thoughtfullness that person shows in giving life your desire is awesome, but you could have got that exact same thing from the store yourself. When you get it the way you got it from them, it becomes more of a tangible, a commodity, a reminder of your constant want of attention, an impersonal gift.Wouldnt it be much more special if they would have read your mind and done something half more elaborate than now? I am sure that would just blow life into that moment.
The other situation. You hoped they would call after something horrible happened. You hoped that they would greet you on your graduation, or come dancing with you on one of your happy-days...but they never did. And that hurts too. And that hurts a lot. And maybe we do that by-force thing, just to evade that unpleasant feeling. And maybe in comparision, to us, we stand justified. But what would be the limit to this? Till when will we be playing this game? And when would we stop expecting? Or still better - when would they bloody understand???

(Any resemblence with any person living or dead is sheer co-incidence)

Thursday, May 6, 2010

The guns will stop pointing when the fingers do.

India is no stranger to terror attacks. But neither is Pakistan, the nation we so regularly accuse of being the cause of it. In fact, in 2009 alone, Pakistan lost over 3000 people to terror attacks. So whatever the diplomats choose to say and the leaders choose to hide, one thing is clear. Despite both nations being victims of it, the thought of working together seems to terrorise us more than the terrorists themselves. But its time we made up for the lost ground by finding a common one. On the eve of India and Pakistan agreeing to resume peace talks, let us remind ourselves that talking face-to-face is the only way out. Because when all methods stand tried and all patience tested, the only thing that remains is for the fingers to stop pointing and the heads to start talking.